In my Chakra workshop, one of the participants asked me how to release judgement about a person. When probed further she realized it was just discernment at her end.
What is judgement?
We all are surrounded by judgments on a daily basis. The idea of good or bad, better or less , fun or boring, beautiful or ugly are connected to this thought process.
Judgment is where the person judging has the power and right to determine what is good or bad. Be it oneself or others. It usually comes from a reactive place inside of us and this reaction often comes from our insecurities, fears, jealousy, ignorance etc…
To say things with a sense of finality…. You/He is vicious!. He/You are selfish!. She/You are unsocial!. You are XYZ
I’m not good enough! I can’t do things properly! People take advantage of me!
Judgement is hurtful, it creates wounds and trauma in a person.
Discernment may seem like judgment, but if we look at it closely we will understand the difference with clarity.
DISCERNMENT is our ability to have a deeper understanding what is appropriate or inappropriate. With discernment we can have a clear understanding about what is good for me and what will work for me and others in the long run.
Discernment helps us to have clarity in our life, to create healthy boundaries for ourselves to grow and be the person we want to be. To have an understanding of our own selves and to not push ourselves to be who we aren’t.
It is about seeing things and situations as they are. It doesn’t come from our EGO SELF but our INNER SELF.
We are so used to of our judging minds that we put a person( or ourselves) in the box and the label is tagged and sealed.
Instead of reacting it’s a good idea if we took a breath and asked ourselves what purpose does it solve if I spoke/ thought about XYZ in this manner. Is there any other way? Do I really wish to spend my energy on this or I rather do something more constructive that helps me grow and makes me happy within.
Say there is a person whose energy doesn’t match with yours. It is absolutely okay to choose not to spend time with them as it doesn’t suit your temperament. Justifying the choice to others by talking about them is where the judgement comes, making the choice to preserve your energy is discernment.
Discernment gives us a clear understanding and the ability to make good choices without having to be better or worse than anyone else.
Discernment comes from understanding both ourselves and others. It comes from compassion for self and others. It also comes from a place of understanding the other person’s point of view.
It is a balance of confidence in our own abilities and humbleness. There will be others who are more skilled or gifted than each of us are, however with discernment we acknowledge our own strengths too.
Discernment brings clarity whereas judgment only serves the illusions of our minds creating confusion . Judgement brings chaos and Discernment brings inner peace.